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being cool to be cool is not so cool

I went to a play today at the middle school where I work. It was amazing! All the students did so well with their performance. I know most of the kids in the play from the library where I work, as many of them choose to hang out there when they finish lunch. It was honestly so lovely to watch.

The end of the play bought tears to my eyes, partly because they performed so well and partly because of the camaraderie I witnessed. But also partly because of missed opportunities in my life. I would have loved to of been a part of the drama program. I also would have loved to stay in Chorus. I was in Chorus until … not sure if it was the end of the 8th or the end of 9th grade. Probably 9th and got out before going to high school. Why? Because word around town was that it was not cool. Not cool? I thought. No cool? Well, I couldn’t be not cool! That just wasn’t going to fly.

So in high school – no chorus, drama, yearbook committee, or track team. Just sleep through class and leave after the last period’s bell rang. I regret that. I think it would have been great fun to do all those things. Oh, even band. How nice it would have been to play an instrument. What was “cool” anyway? Nothing but a bunch of stuff to ruin your health and maybe your life. Hanging around outside drinking beers while underage? Smoking cigarettes? Smoking pot? Hitchhiking? Staying out all night while saying you were sleeping at friends who said the same thing. If I could take only one day from that time and do something different, I would change the following scenario. My two friends (sisters) and I were walking past St. William the Abbot Church, and they said they had to run in and grab a bulletin to show their mother that they went to church. I remember (my Baptism was only two years before) wanting to go in and stay. But I didn’t because it would not have been cool. They probably would have laughed at me.

Don’t get me wrong. I had a fun time, but those times were destructive and could have ended badly. I have to admit. I wish I never smoked and never drank. Drinking caused me to make terrible decisions with my life, and I have seen overindulgence in drinking ruin or take too many lives. If I could redo that time, I would live a clean and healthy life, and I would have gone into that church that day and stayed for Mass. That may have made a difference in my life. A big difference. One where I would have made better decisions because it was what I wanted to do and not because I wanted to be cool or accepted. I wish I knew about the youth group as well as I would have loved that!

Today is different; I am me and do things that enrich my life and make me whole and healthy. I do something I like to do not because it’s cool but because I love it. Watching those kids on the stage today just doing what they love to do, not because it is cool, not because it is uncool, but because it is what they love to do; it was beautiful, and they will have so many fantastic heartfelt memories from good, clean, fun.

I am 63 years young and have been and continue to embrace everything that I love. I need more hours in the day to have time to do it all. I wish I got an earlier start as a teen, but hey, you have to start someplace, and at least I got started. Many don’t get that chance. Now I dream of publishing a book, maybe my life story, and becoming an accomplished author. I also would like to get better at photography, so I am joining a camera club; I would love to learn to speak Italian and go to Italy one day to see where my dad grew up, see my relatives, and meet the ones I have never met. I would love to play piano, even guitar, and a fiddle and a violin and drums, haha. I better pick one, or I will end up doing none. So, in that case, I choose the piano. Thanks to the cast of Descendants for some introspection today. It was fun!

Remember being cool is not so cool. Just be yourself. March to the beat of your own drummer. Be a leader, not a follower. Just be you 😊😘 and you’ll be the coolest!

6 replies on “being cool to be cool is not so cool”

I think you’re spot on!! I missed so many opportunities in my younger years as well. You’re doing it now and it’s inspiring!! Love your photos, keep it up.

Great post. I was in chorus, but not in highschool….i was in band too – i was in that part of highschool. I dont remember the details though.
The thing i kind of regret is there were other classes – BOCES? (no idea what that acronym stood for) classes…that i knew nothing about. I occassionally heard snips or – it seemed “bad” students “got sent to” those programs (they literally got on a bus and went wlsewhere for part of the day) and since i was never “bad” i was in the dark, but they were voccational programs that taught trades – there was, i believe, an auto mechanic program? There was an aeronautic program!!! I think maybe a secretarial program? I still dont even know – but i do know those were things i probably would have enjoyed much more than the other crappy classes i had to endure. I also remember there was a club that learned how to do stage lighting and everything it took to run the behind the scenes stuff for events at the school and for the theater club….i had no idea when where or how to be a part of that but think i would have liked that too.
It seems to me like there were lots of opportunities that were around but seemed kind of secretive unless you actually were friends with the kids who were already involved and then they could tell you about them. Maybe it was because i didnt ever like school so i just pretty much had as little to do with it as possible

I just love this Mary.
There have been times in my life where I wish I made better choices or decisions.
I think we all do.
However it’s about growing and changing our decisions as we grow up and learn and be inspired by the Holy Spirit.

When we allow people in our lives who challenge us to change our behaviors then that is when we see big changes even in the most difficult times in our lives.

God bless you Mary.
Don’t stop growing and blogging it is one of your many gifts.

Thank you so much Donna! I am so glad you enjoy my blog. Thank you so much for your encouragement!

Let’s not forget all the best children’s we made in the past for life lessons we needed to be the people who we are today I love you Mary If you always been cool to me especially now with all your talent

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